Use to be the only thing that would calm me down. I would listen so loudly that I’ll have a hard time hearing my grandchildren, but it helped me live. There was something about the lyrics that screamed the things I couldn’t say. Or lived the life I could. There was something there the beats that my legs would shake to, the pounding in my head that wasn’t his voice. I lived for the moments of sanity, between lyrics and beats.

Save Me, by Unwritten law gave me the lines “Don’t touch me, you’ll get this.”

Safe and Sound, by Azure ray “Love is how it’s lost. Not how it’s found.”

Hide and Seek, by Imogen Heap “Where are we, what the hell is going on?”

Cannonball, by Damien Rice ” there’s still a little bit of you laced with my doubt”

Then when I needed to stop thinking about it, and get away I would listen to things that I coudln’t explain. That held no memories, no thoughts, just pure beats, and bad rhymes.

Buy you a Drink, T Pain —  “Snap Yo Fingers”

Glamorous, Fergie “If you ain’t got no money take yo broke ass home”

There was so many songs that helped me live so next time you see the kid muttering lyrics to every song they know, or listening with headphones on high don’t blame them for hurting their ears, but wonder what they are drowning out. Because I would fall sleep to techno to stop the thoughts in my head and calm the churning in my stomach.

What speaks to you?



Filed under Memories, Thoughts

2 responses to “Music

  1. Music can indeed be the best and most intense detachment and remedy for moods or for the situations around us. I completely agree with you and I’ve done this sort of “angry” listening myself.
    When my dad was dying in the hospital, I would listen to this one song by My Chemical Romance over and over again, just for the words “We’ll carry on, and though you’re dead and gone, believe me – your weary widow marches on.”
    I listen to AFI for for the words “Will the flood behind me put out the fire inside me?”
    I listen to Metallica’s ‘Fade to Black’ for the lyrics. I listen to Tori Amos and Amanda Palmer for empowerment or submission or acceptance of self.
    My point with this recitation is this: I’m just like you about music.

  2. Grégoire

    I would fall sleep to techno to stop the thoughts in my head and calm the churning in my stomach.

    Front 242’s Pulse album is good for this, as are their older ones (Off and Up Evil).

    My favorite is Skinny Puppy’s Rabies. };*) muahahaha!

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